A day of silence

My friend Lou died today, ...My heart hurts so bad for his family.
Taking a day to remember.

I want my life back........

So it has been almost 3 weeks and still no word from the Dr. I am so frustrated.
I worked a full day today and I am having the most muscle tremors I can remember.
They are not the full "Twitch" but small waves of movement there are some "Twitches" but not many which of good my neck can not take much more. For most of the day I have had a burning pain in my shoulders and neck. I had to take a full pain pill at work to make it through the day.
I hate this thing that has taken over my life and am very disappointed in those in the medical profession who choose not to care about the patient and can not seem to put themselves in someone else's shoes for long enough to try to understand their position.
I know others have things worse but I just needed to vent I want to go fishing but I can't even cast a pole not to mention reeling in those monsters my Other Mother grows. LOL
I may just call the Dr. and find out what fire has to be lit to get some assistance.

Loving my family,
Tj
Bear
Miss
Nate
Loxie
and miss Bella

Thanking God for all life's gifts every day.

Monday is not always terrible...Is it?

Woke up in good spirits ans went to work. It was an ok day my neck hurts like a bugger but I made it through my day. I same home to my beautiful 5 kids screaming for food and a bone. After they have all been loved taken out to potty and fed I get to breathe for a minute.
Tj is working which is Great...been feeling pretty lousy that I am only working 30 hrs a week. (Squirrel) Tater will not stop crying I do not know what he wants but he won't let me pet him and he won't stop hollering. Ok back to work..I am going to try to start working more hours and my boss is cool with that as long as I don't over do it.
I still have not heard from the Dr. either starting to get very frustrated....

Well a long weekend is on its way and I got the vacation requests I made. Can't wait to spend some time doing nothing LOL.

Loving my Family,
Tj
Bear
Miss
Nate
Loxie
and miss Bella
Thanking God for all my gifts every day.

Stupid Friday.....

So today was Not a minimal pain day more like a demolition derby.


I worked through it though and the panic attack I had today.


So I come home exhausted and tightly wound as I often am after a panic attack.


I take the dog out to potty I stand out in the back yard with him because he won't potty otherwise if the neighbor dog is out barking which is pretty much all the time.


So here I am standing next to the fence and Bear walked up to me and that damn dog bit his nose through the fence.


The dog did not break the skin but left a mark and made him cry. I get points for not losing it totally. I called the police who sent out animal control, I explained the issue and showed him the picture. I also let Bear out in the yard so he could see the issue. The neighbors were not home or did not want to answer when I knocked and rang the bell. I am not sure what if anything will happen but something needs to. I am very afraid that if that dog gets through the fence to my backyard he will not make it out.



I am a lot calmer now and have been able to replace most of the 4 letter words.

One more day...

So today started rough I forgot my badge for work the husband had to bring it.

I did accomplish quite a bit today but then I got home...

I have been waiting for a package in the mail according to the tracking number it arrived today but the mailman never even showed up....What the French Toast....

My darling husband was home all day and the bills were in the mailbox with the flag up and the mailman never showed up. There are our hard working tax dollars, they complain that no one uses the service but maybe this is why. I know this is petty but if you are reading this you already know me. he he he...

I am sure this will all work out and there are far more importnt things to worry about.

My Mother thinks I am negative so I have a positive thought to leave you with.



If you try you can

If you don't you can't

If you dream it; it can be

Try dream and live your life to the fullest of its possibilities....



Loving my family,

Tj

Bear

Miss

Nate

Loxie

and miss Bella.

Thanking God for all my gifts everyday.

The Lady Dr.

So sick today I can barely hold down the medicine when all of the sudden I remember I have an appointment with the lady doctor Yeah..... My appointment is in 35 minutes AAAAAHHHHHHHH. So my darling husband asks if I want him to go as usual I say if you want to come you can. Well as you can imagine I was in quite a rush to get there and all he can do is keep huffing and slamming his foot into the floor like I forgot how to drive.

Why he wants to go I am not sure to be honest he just sat there complaining about having an appointment. Why is he here? I ask myself then I remember, HE WANTED TO BE....

I love my husband but believe he tries as hard as he can to make his life miserable. Well I have to be glad for that he picked me LOL....

Loving my family,
TJ
Bear
Miss
Nate
Loxie
and miss Bella.
Thanking God for all my gifts everyday

The internet is new...to him.

To summarize today Controlled Chaos. Tj is having a great time with his new net book but I am going to lose my marbles. He thinks he can pay attention to me talk to me and surf the web. He may get over this or learn how to but I may not have the patience to deal with it in the meantime. I know this is my doing by letting my Darling husband think he had any say in anything but Que Serra Serra. I get that the world wide web is all new to him but I have seen more than I need. I think I should be collecting a premium for personal tech support. Part of me is glad he is being exposed to a new medium but I am almost fed up. I suppose I know where my husband is and what he is doing so I guess I should be thankful for what I do have.
Netx month we hit our six year anniversary and I am so suprised he has not realized what he got stuck with lol...
Loving my family.
Tj
Bear
Miss
Nate
Loxie
and miss Bella.
Thanking God daily for all my gifts.